CHILDREN AND THEIR THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU
Parents have different ideas about the characteristics and behavior of their children at different ages. They try to form characters for their children in their mind. In the same way children also have ideas and thoughts about their parents in their mind. They look at their parents differently at different ages. They think about their parents as different role playing characters at different ages.
At ages 0-5 children do not know much. For the lower side of this range they do not know anything about their parents and do not know how to express even if they do. For the upper side of this range they feel their parents are the primary care taker. They see them as their source of food and everything else. At this age they feel safe in the hands of their parents. They think that everything they have is because of them.
At ages 6-11 they are a little confused and competitive at the same time. They begin to go to school full time and wonder what their parents do when they are away at school. They start asking for more things and also start comparing. At this stage parents should carefully understand the needs of their children and adhere to it. Children usually feel the need to be better than everyone and parents need to enhance that be making them more confident and carefully differentiate it from arrogance.
At ages 12-18 children think that their parents are against them. They are in their teens and also in the rebellious stage. They think their parents are always stopping them from doing things. Usually they think their parents always say no to them. The reason for that can be that they are always asking questions that don’t have answers and getting angry. At this stage parents play a larger role than they think. Parents should trust their kids and make them understand softly what is wrong and what is right.
Getting angry at them will create more distance rather than fixing the situation. They should talk to their children before making decisions and convince their children that it is in their best interests. Parents should talk to their children and understand exactly what they need. They should be their friend and not their bodyguard. Parents should carefully take action so that their children do not go out of their way.
From ages 19 on wards there is a certain level of maturity that develops in children. They become more aware of the situations around them and the ways to handle them. They begin to make wiser decisions on their own. A sense of responsibility is developed in them and this is a very good sign. At this stage parents should learn to let go. They should not be possessive and find the heart to let their kids move away from their shelter. It is now the time for them to have their own journey and make their own experiences.
Author: Niketha Mohan
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